UPDATE: Arrow Shot Through Lakewood Resident’s Door Likely From Hunter With Bad Aim

A hunter’s bad aim is likely to blame for an arrow that ended up through a Lakewood resident’s front door, police said.

”After further review of all known information, it appears that the incident happened sometime between the hours of 8:30 am and the time of the call. Given the fact that the home is adjacent to several wooded areas, known for hunting, we believe that the crossbow was most likely, inaccurately fired, by a hunter,” police said.

The Lakewood Police Department would like to remind hunters to hunt safely and responsibly.

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  1. No worries. Soon there won’t be ANY woods left in Lakewood, Brick, Howell, Jackson, and Toms River. Within 5 years, all open space in the aforementioned towns will be destroyed, paved over, and filled with homes, daycares, and schools. There won’t be any animals left to hunt .

  2. According to unconfirmed, fictitious reports, the hunter not only has bad aim, but also has poor eyesight, and often mistakes inanimate objects for animal prey.
    “The other day, we had to rush him to the dentist when he accidentally chomped down a window, thinking the window he had hunted was a deer,” said one Township official, according to the unconfirmed reports.
    Police officials on Thursday reportedly warned the homeowner to be vigilant, in case the hunter returns to the home to bag his “prized” door.
    “The hunter is not a deliberately dangerous person,” a senior police official told the homeowner, “but he has poor eyesight, and he probably thinks your door is animal prey. I suspect he’ll be arriving at your door any day now to collect the door and take it home with him.”
    “He might eat the door or hang it on his wall as a trophy,” the police official said.
    “But it shouldn’t be too difficult to spot this fellow out from the crowd, and to be on guard for him,” the police official said. “He’s the guy wearing dozens of bandages underneath his broken teeth and all around his mouth.”
    “If you see him, give us a call, and keep your distance from him, ” the police official warned Lakewood residents, “because he might assume you’re animal prey, and the next thing you know, he’s bagging you and hanging you on his wall.”

    • Hunting is very safe & remember the hunters were there long before you. When you think how many millions of armed people go out in an uncontrolled setting (unlike a shooting range) shooting powerful rifles & how many accidents there are you’ll be amazed how safe hunting actually is.

  3. The “Hunter” must’ve been standing in front of the house to have the arrow penetrate the metal door the way it did. No accident!

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