By B.D. It was a few months after school had started, and Shulamis was in the middle of English class. A girl had come in because she was transferred to our class for an unknown reason. I thought Wow! We’re getting a new girl. How exciting! But then my teacher told her to sit next to me, to which she replied “No! I don’t like her”.
I was so confused by this. She barely knew my NAME and already, she was going to say that she didn’t like me! I tried to push my feelings down and continue with my work, but it bothered me for the rest of the day.
A couple days later, the bell had rung and I was packing up. The girl had gotten in trouble and had to stay after school for a couple of minutes. And the whole time she kept calling me slow. I wanted to say many mean things back, but I just held it in and continued on my way. I was so mad! It went on like this, her calling me mean names like stupid, ugly, dumb etc. Then, during class one day, we were making poster boards for a project. She kept commenting behind my back that my poster board looked babyish. Then she did something that no one had EVER done. She threw markers at me. I was really upset by this and began yelling at her and throwing them back, And then I got in trouble.
I needed help!
Introducing Regesh.
The Regesh Hotline is a network created by a group of skilled and caring educators who, through their personal work, realize that more can be done to take a preventive approach to helping our youth going through difficult times.
Regesh Network, located in Lakewood, NJ, is a growing call center run by a team of specially trained individuals, handpicked under the direction of the Mashgiach of the Beth Medrash Govoha Yeshiva, Rabbi Yehuda Jacobs. All calls shall be completely anonymous.
The organizers feel that when tackling a problem in its early stages, many problems can be worked out before they spiral out of control.
Prevention is the key word here.
Regesh will never turn anyone away for help. We are a listening ear, ready to help deal with life’s challenges. Our dedicated call center, shall have a boys hotline, girls hotline and a parenting hotline.
We don’t claim to solve everyone’s problems and hope to direct each individual to the resources that can get them the help that they need.
The Regesh Network shall be an evolving and growing organization. We don’t proclaim that we will solve the “Teen at Risk“ crisis, however, this is just one small step to let our youth know that there is someone out there that cares.
[TLS]
Good idea
I hope it works out
Att TLS readers:
We are very exited at our upcoming launch of our hotlines.
Please feel free to give your opinions or suggestions as this will help us grow .
We thank TLS for helping us launch our message .
May you be blessed with everything good .
If anyone would like to reach us you may shoot an email to
[email protected]
It’s nice that someone out there cares. But will you side with the child if the school is in the wrong? Will u stick up for the kids and confront the teachers and principals? My 15 year old daughter was in a hs here. The teachers and principals told kids not to talk to her because they are bad for her neshama. Teachers denies it. Principals denied it. What would you have done in a situation like this?
Sadly, Mommy Dearest is right. Often times a problem comes and the teachers & principals don’t know what to do ! How could they ? They’re not trained for students who had trauma or ocd, add etc. I hope Regeah can spot that & help out. That would be a HUGE benefit right there. HatLocha !!
To Mommy Dearest:
Your daughter is the reason Regesh was created.
We call ourselves The Regesh Network because it is our intention to Network with the Teacher > Principal > Rov and everyone involved with the child .
Imagine if you would’ve had our team of twelve plus Rabbi Yehuda Jacobs advocating on your daughters behalf?
In that scenario , we would’ve immediately assigned a mentor, someone that your daughter, anonymously ( if she wanted to)
Speak to on a daily basis.
It would be the mentors job to help your daughter realize her strengths , that she’s a Yiddishe neshomah, with lots to give over.
And that mentor would stay with her , til she’s on her own.
At the very least, it would’ve been much easier to cope in that scenario.
@mommy dearest ( perfect name btw), how letting them get off the ground first before throwing verbal punch. Your asking for them to be a advocate? People call for a number of reasons, not always school related. I’m encouraged they have seperate phone lines. Let’s face it not all our little ones are angels. Some are troubled and as a result some cause or get into trouble. This organization isn’t great news. It speaks to the problems were facing in our own families, township, schools, etc. Ok great another hot line. So maybe it will help or just bring more to the surface instead of people thinking it’s just an anomaly. Your sounding off about one personal specific, and sounds like you got stepped on. I agree the kids do need a voice, unfortunately that can be counter productive. The main objective is help anyone that needs help to embrace and enjoy a good life. It would be very interesting to see labels on every person on what their thoughts or what their going through, then we might get some real insight when saying hello to someone. Imagine the endless assortment of things you would hear. Good, bad, sad, nervous, panic, sickness, money, no kids, to many kids. Sad our society has a need for this. Yes I know what I’m talking about with two degrees and years of experience to back my opinions up.
This sounds like a good organization with the right intentions. I hope they go about this the right way.
I grew up in brooklyn and when I was a teenager, I got depressed and went off the derech. There were some very well meaning organizations that sound very similar to this one that reached out to help me. They honestly seemed very sincere. The problem is, it became very clear, very quickly, that they were only interested in my “nishama”. Everytime I tried to get help about my depression, anxiety, lack of friends, etc, the conversation would always steer back to “have you davened today? here put on tefilin. No more non-kosher food, etc” – that is all fine a good but practicing religion simply out of rote will not solve ANY problems that a teenager is going to. I got bounced around to three different organizations who all had, at their core, the desire to make me frum again, with very little focus on my personal and mental health and happiness. Needless to say their plan backfired. I did not go to them to be reminded about wearing tzitzis or not eat mcdonalds. I got that all day long from my parents. I need help. Mental help. Help with the pain and suffering I was going through. But no one seemed to think that was the priority.
If anyone from regesh or similar organization is reading this, please understand that troubled teens need guidance, friendship and support. They are not interested in being forced, manipulated or bribed into davening and keeping kosher. That might come down the road, but that is not what they are coming to you for. If you think it is, you will simply drive them away.
As was told to Reb Elya Svei, Z”L, If only kashrus would be adhered to, the youth wouldn’t and adults wouldn’t be where they are heading, R”L
Wow, 40+ yrs taught u that ?! Maybe its 40+ yrs too much. So, every kid that had trouble is because of Kashrus. Is that what ur saying ? Im R Elya Zt”l laughed at that statement just like I did.
I don’t understand. A girl is relentlessly bullied, finally reacts, and now she has to call the ‘Teen At Risk’ hotline?
finally STARTING to get to the crux of the matter
To my experience:
Yes we know this
The people at Regesh have been dealing with youth for many years.
The way you were dealt with was definitely not the way we would .
Yes of course everyone makes mistakes but I would hope that when someone has a similar situation we will direct him with the professional help that he needs. Along with our staff , we also have a team of professionals who are guiding us with each case .
Some of it is smartness , but a lot is Siyata Dishmaya to guide the person with the right advice
To the Kashrus Guy
Rabbi M Maslaton AH, who was the master at working with our youth would say:
There are five reasons why children go off the path:
A. When their schools or parents over pressure the kids too much
B. When the child doesn’t feel success not in limudei kisses or chol or in any area for that matter
C. When the child feels ignored or unloved by his parents
D. When the child is abused or suffers a mental trauma at a young age
E. Bad friends ( on this he would emphasize that it’s incumbent to pray hard that your child should have good friends
Limudei Kodesh
Sorry spell check stinks
Patsy
This is NOT a teen at risk line
This is meant for someone who has a problem that they should have someone to talk to
Ideally it’s best to confide in a parent , teacher or principal
But the reality is many, many kids don’t have that type of relationship.
That case was just an imagined scenario .
The girl in the story should’ve went for help right away
Most kids and even us adults won’t until the problem gets worse .
Good luck to regesh. Mommy dearest… I was a teenager like that as well. It’s a shame that there are some that don’t see the good in every child. Every child is diamond …. Although some may be a diamond in the rough l, it is the responsibility of all mechanchim to help and do their best to clean up the rough. Not just discard these precious souls. Unfortunately it takes a tragedy to happen to these children r”l before some realize what was lost.
Hatzlacha rabba to retest. Please remember your mission.
Is it would be all free services? It’s was few time , when we wanted this type of help for our child, we only got discouraged , and couldn’t get it ( since our budget is tide as it is) because of fees that mentors like this was charging.
Kudos to 2 Team regesh and much hatzlacha
To mommy dearest,
I sincerely feel bad for your situation, but I’m just curious how, if the principal and teacher deny it how do u know they said it (if your daughter told you, while I am absolutely NOT saying she’s lying I still think it should b taken with a grain of salt as she is the Baal davar)
Yes everything would be free
We are a not for profit
Created l’ toivas Haklal