Readers’ Scoop: Sharing Mailboxes And Values

Dear readers of TLS. I’d have sent this letter to my landlord, but I chose not to so as not to strain any relationships. But I do hope my landlord, or any landlord and tenant for that matter, read this.

A couple months ago, my landlord, (and yes, I’m a legal tenant for those that want to know) with whom I share mailboxes with, began ordering a clothing magazine, which contains many unrefined (to say the least) photos.

Now I’m not the nosy type of tenant, nor do I look to poke my nose in where its not my business.

However, as my children grow older, and sometimes bring in the mail for me, I do feel that it’s extremely inappropriate for them, or my husband, to be seeing these unrefined images.

My suggestion would be to either request from the sender that the magazines be packaged in a more private manner, or that you consider canceling your subscription for it.

Thank you in advance for your consideration.

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41 COMMENTS

41 Comments
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In all fairness
14 years ago

I am actively trying to limit the type of catalogs that are sent to me in the mail. I freak at the pictures, and no matter how hard i try, my name seems to be a prime candidate for clothing catalogs, i call them and tell to stop sending them and to keep me off any offers. I never order clothing on line. it doesn’t always seem to help – so it really may not be his fault.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Have your landlord bring in the mail let him separate it for you.Or keep track the expected dates the magazine comes and avoid getting the mail on those days.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Move out !!!!

Anonymous
14 years ago

Have your wife bring in the mail.

Anonymous
14 years ago

another option is for your landlord to take in the mail, and give you your mail, instead of you taking it in and giving them their mail.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Have a talk with your landlord explain to him that you don’t want your kids exposed to these images , yourself as well and he will be kind enough to rectify the problem.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Teach your children not to be nosy. Are you talking about Lands end or old navy? or any other catalog don’t open it up and look inside.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Put a mechitza in the ” MALE box”

cool masmid
14 years ago

Not justifying your landlord for subscribing to those companies, but why all the fuss? Just tell your kids that from now on a new rule; no one is to bring in the mail. And then you will bring it in either before or after the landlord has gotten his mail….. and magazines.

Anon
14 years ago

Why don’t you just put up your own mail box and label it with your apartment number or name.

Are U Sure U Ordered It
14 years ago

Many people receive “clothing magazines” otherwise known as junk mail without asking to recieved them or “ordering” them. It is very hard to actually stop getting them.

Wondering
14 years ago

I agree, but get the mail yourself

Noam
14 years ago

Get a seperate mailbox & farteck!

Anonymous
14 years ago

i have the same prob but the other way around but i dnt care tough luck u dnt like it move out

Anonymous
14 years ago

we need filtered mailboxes too.

Hank
14 years ago

Get the mail yourself!

What?
14 years ago

Why don’t you mind your own business. If these are the issues we have, we’re in great shape!

david putty
14 years ago

Oy. We need moshiach.

Leave it be..
14 years ago

If you are concerned- then don’t let your children take the mail out of the mailbox. Simple solution! You can’t control or stop other people from what they do.

someone says
14 years ago

get your own mail box (if your landlord say’s it’s ok) or you just get a mail box at the post office.

Yanky
14 years ago

Stop forcing ur chumros on other ppl. If u don’t like it, move to farm in middle of nowhere, shut down ur Internet, and homeschool ur kids.

grouchy says
14 years ago

Don’t be so frum on yenems cheshbon

curious
14 years ago

Well, you seem to be on the internet, so I wouldn’t judge your landlord if I were you. Do you take your kids to the mall? There are not tznius things there too! Or how about Walmart, or Target, or ANY store that has clothing?! You can’t always control what your kids see out in the real world but you can teach them how to deal with it.

Anonymous
14 years ago

Get your own mail box. whats the big deal. Or how about this get the mail before your kids come home from school.

Anonymous
14 years ago

I ordered women’s clothing just once from somewhere and now I am inundated with catalogs from many companies selling women’s clothes. It’s not something in my control. Children shouldn’t be taking in the landlords mail. And you shouldn’t be looking at his mail either.Just sort it, take yours and MYOB.

Ouch
14 years ago

The responses are really pathetic. Everyone is jumping on the letter writer about minding her own business.

TAKE A STEP BACK.

She specifies that she is looking for a solution in order to protect her family, not to care what her landlord reads. It’s a little odd that everyone is getting all worked up whether it’s her business or not.

In terms of a solution, it seems that the only practical (and least likely to strain your relationship) thing to do is to pick up the mail yourself.

IMO

fred
14 years ago

If you are a legal tenant then you are entitled to your own mailbox! So get your own mailbox. Or you can just get the mail yourself. Or you can move out. Its a free world And if his wife wanys to get those stuff its her choice!

big scary guy
14 years ago

everyone chill out!!

Anonymous
14 years ago

its more tznuis to buy by mail than at the mall…

Anonymous
14 years ago

for heavens sake!!
let each person do what they want, stop defining other ppl to your standards!

here is the deal
14 years ago

If this were in fact a legal apartment, he WOULD have his own mail box. So this is clearly not a legal apartment. So stop complaining and live in the real world

Chaim
14 years ago

if this really bothers you, pay $50 for a p.o. box

?
14 years ago

The problem does not with the homeowner the homeowner has every right to recieve what ever mail he chooses to, why not get your own mailbox, I didn’t even know its legal to share a mail box. What are you doing looking at his/her mail anyway ??

I Love Lakewood!
14 years ago

I have a much worse problem. My landlord does ZUMBA while getting the mail. Now there’s ZUMBA all over the driveway and . . .

hi
14 years ago

#34 lol

Federal law
14 years ago

don’t take their mail under penalty of law.

The Center is Awesome !!
14 years ago

For all those saying “let ur wife bring in the mail” space in & re-read. The writer IS the wife. The truth is, its a serious problem. We have dept store credit cards & we get tons of flyers announcing sales & whatever &, at times, the pics are very, um, unrefined. The Mashigiach spoke about this yrs ago: the lady should bring in the mail & discard the unrefined matter b4 it gets into the house. It sounds extreme but its an absolute necessity.

Thoughtful neighbor
14 years ago

I always separate the mail for my neighbors husband before I give it to him. I dont want him to have any nisoyon chas vsholom. All the women in a condominium complex need to look out for their neighbors husbands and vice a versa.

email
14 years ago

Just switch to email it works much better

Huh?
14 years ago

Thoughtful
All the women need to look out for the neighbors husband? Mind your own family please. This is the problem. Everyone gets involved in the neighbors business. It is the most untzniusdik way to live. And has caused many Worse problems than some catalogues.

YL
14 years ago

FYI – I once got a very prust magazine and when i called to tell them to get me off their list they let me know that another company (an online shoe store) had provided them with my information and that i’d only be able to stop getting these magazines by calling the shoe store to remove myself from that list.
For the person who is saying they get their mailings because of store credit cards – you can call those places as well and ask to be removed from their mailing list.