Readers’ Scoop: Hashem Is Sending Us A Message

Readers-Scoop-Logo smallDear TLS,
I want to address a problem in this community without pointing fingers at any soul or any family. Unfortunately, there has been many tragedies lately. Children being niftar young, I even heard that a sefer torah fell on the floor in a shul in Lakewood, bad car accidents, etc etc. The Chafetz Chaim says that the punishment for machlokes and lashon hara is that children will die young. No, I am not a Navi and I don’t know the reasons why Hashem is sending us these messages. but what I do know is, for sure, that there is too much fighting in our community and too much lashon hara.

I am not even referring to the politics between HH and Bob Singer. I am referring to plain people, every day lives. Words have the power to break or build and how many times a day do you forget to think before talking and end up saying the wrong thing?

Have you spoken lashon lara today on a fellow yid?

Have you ruined a shidduch because you thought it was more important to say that peice of lashon hara?

Have you consulted with a rav before saying that peice of lashon hara to ask if it falls under the category of Toeles?

Have you insulted someone today with an action or words?

Rabbosai!! Its the machlokes that Hashem is upset about!!! The stories of fights between families that I hear about in this town are horrific! Parents fighting with their kids, neighbors fighting, friends fighting, etc its all horrible! (A side point is that if people would consult rabbonim more often, there would probably be less machlokes and lashon hara).

How many people do you know that are torn, ripped apart, from a fight? I know too many.

It is time for everyone to wake up and start acting like Torah True Jews. Do you think Hashem wants us fighting and destroying people, ruining people’s reputations, ruining people’s shidduchim, damaging a Tzelem Elokim, giving bad information on someone when a school calls you to ask if they should accept them, etc??

We are a town of a lot of people sitting and learning torah but our ethics and morals are below par. We are begging for another Holocaust R”L or another Churban.

Just keep in mind, next time you open up your mouth to talk, think for a second and think about what you are about to say. Remember, once Lashon Hara is said, you can never go and “collect” it back because it spreads like wild fire.

The machlokes must end. We have plenty of rabbonim to consult with if you don’t know how to end a machlokes you are in or if you feel you need help in this area.

I know too many people who walk around with a grudge towards someone, broken, suffering from the machlokes and lashon hara that goes on in this town.

Words have the power to build world or destroy worlds. Which would you rather YOUR words do?????

Thanks for listening.

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  1. In your very letter you say much loshon hora. Yo mmention names, BTW HH was kuloi lesheim shomayim & lesheim toeles hatzibur, he funded himself, & quit after he got a message over. He is from our last oskim betzorchei tzibur beemuna, that we have or will see, until the geulah.

    As for fights, most happen with best freinds because they are the only ones who could hurt you enough to be bothrered, and in most cases both sides are torn & broken, & wish for chadeish yomeinu kekedem, but this builds people.
    To make up it takes H’KB”H himself who is oiseh shalom bimroimov hu yaaseh shalom aleinu.
    This is what is going to happen just B4 the geulah, when HKB”H say Hinei anoichi Sholeiach lochem es Eliyahu Hanovie lifnei boi yoim hagadol vehanora veheishinv leiv avos al bonim veleiv bonim al avosam. Bekarov beyomeinu.

  2. Well said & done.
    when can we talk about machlokes better then this weks parsha. Where Korach was not satisfied enough that he was one of the richest people, he was also a levi that served in the Mishkon. BUT he was not satisfied enough HE WANTED HONOR & RESPECT & envied other people & that brought him down.
    BOTTOM LINE: Machlokes all starts from Jealousy & envy of another person. but when a person is satisfied with his lot he never gets jealous & is always happy. May everyone always be satisfied with their lot & come together as one for the Ge”ula shleima b’karov

  3. Git Gezugt! Just see how few comments you get though! You will see that people care alot more about shtusim. This is too real and too relevant. everyone will look the other way. Me? Nah. It’s all the other people talking lashon harah and being involved in machlokes.

  4. I agree with this article 100%. I cannot understand your obsession though with “this town”! It must be mentioned about 10 times in the article. Unfortunately this is a maclah that plagues the frum community at large(at least in Brooklyn AND Lakewood)Why the obsession with THIS town?!? We’re also full of this sickness but stop making it like it’s just Lakewood. Sadly that is far from the case.

  5. How many ppl like myself have had such tremendous tzaar from the school situations in this town???? (we’re talking about getting a 4 year old into Primary) Maybe its time for the school administrators to think about the matzav and do something about it!!

  6. To the moderator,

    I suppose at least you will get to read this. I am very disappointed to see that you removed my comment regarding the loshon hara status of this article. I am wondering if this was a mistake, or what the reason might be. It certainly fit the criteria according to the rules and was written very respectfully. To repeat: I commented on the severity of the lashon hara status of the actual article since it is derogatory about a rabim in a very public forum, and suggested that TLS instead post positive articles e.g. about the amazing chesed and support in the community.

  7. I disagree 125% w/ this article. I don’t know where u live in this town. But I live in the Princeton/14th street area, I’m a big shmoozer, so I know what’s going on & I’m proud to say I dunno about 1 machlokes in my area. I daven, at different times, in Kol Shimshon, Coventry, R’ Gruber’s, Bnei Boruch (Herzog), R’ Hirshberg, R’ Teitelbaum’s and I don’t know about anybody fighting among friends, kids or the like. No, I’m not living in a cave. But in my side of town, we’re all getting along. As are most people in most neighborhoods. So, have a nice day. Shut off ur computer & go back to learn.

  8. I totally disagree with both the facts of this post and also assuming
    that you have your facts (which you don’t) I have a problem with the way you make your argument. For one thing when you mention a # of times ‘I know too many…’ or as you seem to know all the fights that are going on in town. That would seem to me very contradictory for someone as yourself to ‘be in the know’ of all the fights going on in town given how you feel about what machlokes and loshon hora has done to this town as you so ‘eloquently’ mention in your article. I think when one reads your article we could apply the saying of all time ‘if you have nothing important to say, say nothing’….

  9. 12- u happen to be wrong bc obviously the letter write does know of machlokes happening around him so all bc u don’t know of any, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. #14-i cudnt get my 4 year old into school bc of lashon hara. Am I the only person suffering bc of lashon hara and or machlokes? No! I think we all need to listen to the message that god is sending us

  10. Have you ruined a shidduch because you thought it was more important to say that peice of lashon hara?

    Have you consulted with a rav before saying that peice of lashon hara to ask if it falls under the category of Toeles?

    It is also very important to consult with a Rov to make sure you aren’t withholding information that will cause much misery to one or both of the parties after marriage.

  11. nice article Reb Yid. true about the detriment of lashon horah. however, to surmise everything being toluy on L”H with such obsession is being a bit short minded. for #1 as some ppl here pointed out . #2. as much as i commend you for some1 finally taking on a recognition of a major bain odom lchaveiro issue which is a serious problem here in Lakewood. I think you could have hit the target alot better. what ppl need to realize is that L”H is only a totzaoah of the ROOT of THE PROBLEM which is BD MIDDOS such as KINAH the #1 MACHLAH of Lakewood is NISHT FARGINEN another yid. so nice to think of L”H but think again. sur marah vaaseh tov . its about time ppl start learning mussar , not the mussar on how to find faults in others , but rather How to IMPROVE oneself n become a better fellow Yid .less kinah less L”H less machlokes. thank you!

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