Chaim – I remember the time when we first met. It was just about 12 years ago, my first day in BMG. I was placed in the dorm on the third floor away from most of my friends who were in the Irv. It was a confusing time for me .I had no family living in the Lakewood area, so I was all alone in unfamiliar territory.
The first day of the zman is always confusing and stressful because you have to find a Chavrusah amongst thousands of talmidim. And to make matters more confusing, I was about to go into the Freezer but I was still in middle of a Parsha.
At the end of that long day I was getting ready to go to sleep. That’s when you came over to introduce yourself with your trademark warm smile. I did not know who you were and had never met you before but your sincere introduction struck me at a time when I was vulnerable and that was the beginning of a long and close relationship.
Chaim-you and I became instant friends. Sometime later you joined me for an off Shabbos at my parents’ home in Flatbush. You were not a guest or an outsider, but rather you instantly became a part of the family. Not just ours, but the whole block. In the summer you used to join us at my parents bungalow upstate and within 24 hours you had 60 more families to call your own. That was you, Chaim always with a smile, always something funny and witty to say and always warm and gentle.
I remember walking by the lake together with you, discussing shidduchim and how we wanted to get a shidduch from a good family. You wanted so badly to move on and build a family of your own. You were always great with kids and you always made them feel special. Even 4 years later after I found my bashert and started to build a family, you would love come over to spend time with the kids.
I spent the first few years of my married life in Eretz yisroel and we spoke less frequently but you were still part of my parent’s household and spent many a Shabbos there. You had the most amazing sense of humor, and you loved to make everybody laugh. We always felt it was an honor and a privilege to have you over.
When we heard the terrible news on Friday afternoon, everyone had the same reaction: “What?? How could that be??” It was impossible to wrap our minds around this. Chaim, you were full of life. You were the life of the party. Your very name means ‘life’. How could you be gone?
On Sunday morning, you were honored with a levaya that was fit for a Rosh Yeshiva. The streets around BMG were a sea of black as hundreds upon hundreds came to say goodbye to you. I’m sure you would have had something clever and funny to say about that.
May your family have a nechama. And may they be comforted by the knowledge that you touched so many lives and made so many people happy. I’m honored to have been considered one of your friends.
We’ll miss you.
(TLS welcomes your letters by submitting them to [email protected])
This letter brought me to tears
What a beautiful letter! May it be a Nechama to chaims family and to all of those who knew him.
such a nice letter!
Very well said!
I am crying from reading this letter! What a beautiful piece of writing!
I was a good friend of Chaim and everything you wrote was absolutely true. Thank you!
you could not have said it any better. What a gem of a person he was and such a loss!
This is such a beautiful letter. Thank you so much for posting it. I am married to Chaim’s brother and know that it will provide him and my mother-in-law with some peace. I’m grateful for that. Thank you again.
Very well said. I also was on the 3rd floor of the dorm for over two years. We were all one big happy family there. Chaim was always there for us when ever we needed him. He always was there for me . Encouraging me in some big steps in life. Even after I got married chaim and moved out of dorm. I always though about chaim.
Chaim I will truly miss but you’ll always be in my heart.
I davened slichos at the 12:50 AM in BMG with Chaim this past elul.
He would place his shtender on the top of the chair so he would have the slichos at the right height. It looked very comfortable so I tried it as well. It was easier said than done and I had a hard time keeping the shtender snugly on the chair and it kept on slipping off. Chaim noticed this, although I was in the back and he was in the front. He walked over to me and gave me a brief tutorial as to how to select just the right type of shtender and chair that would compliment each other perfectly. Truly the sweetest and holiest caring type of yid we all would like to emulate.
A. Deutsch
A. Deutsch
How does one describe a burial as “beautiful”? But that was the word that came to mind when I was standing in the cemetery at your Kevurah, Chaim. You embraced all Jews from all walks of life. And on Sunday, all Jews from all walks of life embraced you. Everyone there, whether from Teaneck or Lakewood or anywhere, we all felt the same way: “Chaim, you were one of ours, and we are so proud to have known you.” You see? Even in your petirah, you were bringing Klal Yisrael together!
Lech L’Shalom.
We will never forget you.
beautiful letter so true brought me to tears