To whoever cares to read,
I know this topic has been discussed on the Scoop a couple of years ago, but it’s worth bringing up again, especially during this summer season.
I’m talking about sharing vacation pictures on social media for the world to see.
In my opinion, it’s just not right, and here’s why.
Firstly, it’s a tremendous breach of tznius. Certain things are just not for the world to see. Besides, all it really does is causes jealousy, Shalom Bayis issues and more – your social media pages don’t exactly give an honest and full picture of what your life is all about, all it shows is the glitz and glamour.
Secondly, it’s a sensitivity issue: many people don’t have a husband, wife or children to travel with, and seeing others’ vacation photos can be painful and isolating; many people may not be healthy enough to travel, or they may not have the financial means to take a vacation. This too puts a dagger into people’s hearts.
Lastly, with our brothers and sisters still being held hostage in Eretz Yisroel, I don’t think this is the time to show off luxurious vacations.
Just sharing my thoughts for those who may not have looked at it this way.
Thank you.
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welcome to this sick world of social media, NOTHING gonna change, as every idiot has to post what they had for lunch
And breakfast…and lunch….
I think all of the above are true, and I agree it’s a very important topic. However, there’s a way to preempt the problem. You can get rid of your social media account which gives you access to vacationers’ pictures, or get a basic phone etc.
The writer isn’t offended. The writer wants to make sure others (vulnerable people) aren’t offended. Deleting her (or his) social media account doesn’t help them.
Well said. I just want to add one thing. Sharing any family pictures in statuses should also be stopped. What is wrong with people that they feel the need to share their personal family pictures with others? What is the purpose? why do I need to see pictures of your wives, children, grandchildren…Keep it to yourself.
no question that this concept of sharing does more harm than good. But, if there is a call to stop this over-exposure of our lives to others, it’s not only vacations! It’s the simchas; the over-the-top proposals that breach both good taste and tznius, the lavish meals, the clothing, the bands. There are people out there who are going through their own pain and although they do want to feel part of your simcha, it can take an emotional toll.
Get bz
Wait…what’s social media?
AFAF
Please keep your jealousy to yourself.
Or just keep you rattention-starved needs to yourself
If you were concerned about tzniyus you wouldn’t be on social media to notice this.
Thank you for a wonderful and constructive letter.
Your last point about the hostages is very real and true.
For those approximate 100 hostages, they are going through a real live holocaust. For them it’s like Auschwitz 1943.
Auschwitz was not as bad as the Hamas tunnels, no air, no food, no hygiene, being used as a human shield, then as a bargaining chip, psycological manipulation, confusion if anybody cares if they knew, then coming back to an unsympathetic society back home, self questioning why one neighbor had a nice Pesach seder and the other has the bitter tears, fighting for hope against despair, and…
the only real answer to it all is to return to Hashem!
Ein Od Milvado!
This isn’t everyone else’s problem, if you have an issue with it (as many others do) simply delete your social media apps. You can only be affected by all of it, if you let yourself.
Sounds like you shouldn’t be on social media to begin with.
Sounds like the author shouldn’t be on social media.
Don’t be on social media and you’ll solve all your problems. What you don’t see can’t harm you! I don’t know what ur talking about it because I dint have social media.
Nobody cares shut up cry about it
I care
It’s important especially these days to tone it down. Klal yisroel is in pain. Let’s be sensitive to it
Do yourself a favor and go off of social media. You will never have to see anything you don’t want to. Anyone upset about what’s on Social Media has a very simple solution. Go off. It’s actually that simple.
I thought it was a Mitzvas Asei to post vacation pix!
It is actually a Mitzvah not to post.
If a person is
מתגבר
And doesn’t post, that’s a beautiful opportunity to daven to Hashem and ask for help. I heard this from a few Rabbonim.
Anonymous Rabbonim? Can’t be mekabel…
wow a little chippy today now aren’t we?? you happen to be wrong because there are many people who care. the answer to just get off of SM is a tough one. people want to pick and chose. they want funny clips and news updates and family news but dont want to see what the author mentioned.
when i first read the letter my reaction was “your right i really should think before i post” as i think the letter was directed at the posters not the readers.
by saying go off social what your saying is…the problem isn’t us posting ridiculous, inappropriate private things because that’s totally okay, and the viewer should go “shut up and cry”.
do a little self introspection and be a little accepting of constructive criticism. better yourself dont better others.
sounds like a good cry can do you well Miss Julia
Perhaps because people feel empty inside that they feel a need to validation from others to exist. Just a thought. It comes from low self esteem.
Agreed
In today’s world it seems like everyone is offended by something that someone else does ,sharing family vacation photos would be the very last thing for me to find offensive !
I enjoy other people’s vacation pictures
Their pleasure makes me happym
Me too. I haven’t traveled in many years and that is how I get to see many new exotic places. Besides anyone can go to a local park and post gorgeous pictures that look like they went someplace nice.
Personally, I don’t like posting pictures of people, but that’s a personal thing I like when other people post pictures of their family.
They aren’t posting it in your front yard or pasting it on your windows. They aren’t direct messaging them to you. They are posting them in places where you voluntarily go and see them. If you don’t like it, don’t go to see them. This isn’t the same as over the top simchas where people are invited, and it isn’t the same as people showing off in the real world. It’s posted in a forum that’s meant for it. Grow up.
There are pics to post& not to… With this I say as a person who would love to be able to travel but with 2 young kids 1 being fragile medically & not much fund Bec any extras goes to medical expenses. I enjoy seeing peoples Vaca pics. It gives me joy & a glimpse of places I wish I could go to. I’m happy they got to go & they shared their views of the palace gives me joy. A happy person will find ways to be happy a kvetchy person will find what to kvetch about a jealous person… Live vicarious through others. Learn not to need what others have.
I’m me I’ve got my blessings I count even the tiny ones. Allow yourself have joy for others
G-d bless you! So refreshing!
Wow. Your attitude is one that we could all learn from. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.
Very true. Only people that feel empty and low self esteemed, have a need for this. People that feel good about themselves don’t need to be sharing their vacation on sm. People that are criticizing this letter, usually bc. The truth hurts.
The 10th (& often forgotten) commandment.
“You shall not covet your neighbors house. You shall not covet your neighbors car. You shall not covet your neighbors fancy clothes. You shall not covet your neighbors liquor cabinet. You shall not covet your neighbors vacation.”
Perhaps if people spent more time working on being “Sameach B’Chelko” they wouldn’t feel the need to tell other people what to do.
p.s. “All it shows is glitz & glamour.” Isn’t that obvious? Of course people only post at their best. Who DOESN’T understand that which is why it shouldn’t bother you.
Can I come with a giant pritzus billboard outside your window? Of course not. Even though it’s a mitzvah to look away.
Don’t make this jealousy mitzvah harder 10 fold.
The Torah doesn’t say, “You shall not live in a nice house because it might make your neighbor jealous.” The obligation is on the neighbor to work on not being jealous & instead being happy for your neighbor that they were blessed by Hashem to have a nice house.
(Your comparison to Pritzus is terrible. There’s nothing inherently wrong with having a nice house.)
Yaakov Avinu advised his children when they were about to go down to Mitzraim , that they should not take along too much stuff, because it may cause jealousy. The Mefarshim discuss this .
I am not saying that you are wrong.
This is a different approach.
Yaakov Avinu was concerned about making non-Jews jealous & causing Antisemitism. Very different than Frum neighbors.
@Confused
There is nothing wrong with having a nice house. We’re talking about shmooshing it in someone else’s face.
Anyone else old enough to remember what the kli yakar wrote on devorim perek beis, pasuk gimmil?
No, I don’t know what it says there
My flip phone doesn’t allow me to view them
Pritzus is one thing. Predators can find your kids and where you are. Facebook and Instagram are prime hunting grounds. There is ZERO privacy. Lose them right away.
the have nots are always kvetching about what the haves have. that being said, rabbi pesach krohn’s mother used to urge people not to share their vacation experiences because “no one needs to know”
Although not easy to say, easier to say than to do. It seems like step one is for each of, before, every action, to think what does HKBH want from me now, part of which is, am I doing right by my fellow man. Despite where we ourselves are holding and what we are doing, are we trying to feel our fellow’s joy and pain. To a degree, all the rest is commentary.
Just being happy for those who were able to go on vacation will go a very long wayay.
Being happy for haves will go a very long wayay!.
Thanks for the dates – I was wondering about them
as a person without social media but has friend who have, i think people enjoy seeing other ppls vacation pics and thats kinda what social media is there for, to share good moments with other ppl, to share nice places with other ppl, sometimes guys would get good ideas for different trips from other peoples posts. social media is there to blow up the small things we do to make it look much more exciting and it gives us a thrill! i totally understand posting pics of vacation and trips. now, for those getting jealous, i cannot fully defend you as that is BH not my nisayon in life and i dont even fully understand it which may have to do with my nisayon of being humble, for i am fully confident in the way my life goes that i have the best life possible for me. just a little tip for you guys that are jealous – always remember its not as good in real life as the pictures make them appear. also, dont run to different places or things, we all have a certain amount of enjoyment decreed for us each year, Hashem will send it to you without you running anywhere, i know cuz i dont chase good things but they still come my way BH!! try to find positive in other jews and hashem will be positive with you!!! the posts arent there to get you guys jealous so dont misuse them!!!
Being happy for the haves will go a very long wayay.
Well said
Get rid of your social media and start enjoying real life!!!!!
I’m an Am Haaretz about social media, are you talking about Facebook and such ? Then I agree with you, I’ve heard about the nonsense photos and comments that people post on these groups. I have WhatsApp though, and strictly family chats. I don’t see what’s wrong with sharing family pictures on that. In fact, it’s great.
This is something that bothers me all the time when I see people’s WhatsApp status’s etc. I used to post as a teenager but then I realized what am I doing this for? Even if you think people shouldn’t be jealous…. Which isn’t realistic, still having people jealous of you is not a good thing. Also, it’s very different to post on a chat, where people are choosing to be apart of that. If you are flicking through statuses you aren’t. If you’re not mature enough to handle this then don’t read it.
My very wise mother used to say, “you only know how you look from the inside and know how others look only from the outside so how can you be jealous of others”. Dwell on that.