Dear Lakewood community, I hope this message finds you in good health.
I am writing to express my concern about the gap between the end of Yeshivas and the start of camp.
As a working parent, I find this one-week gap quite challenging to manage. The children have absolutely nothing to do, and the parents, whether learning or working, can’t manage.
I have a suggestion that may help both parents and children during this transition period.
I would suggest that Yeshivas and camps work together to arrange for one or two days off before the start of camp. This will give parents and children some breathing space and make the transition smoother.
Thank you for taking the time to consider my suggestion.
TLS welcomes your letters by submitting them to letters@thelakewoodscoop.com
i just cant wait to see the letter you post for the girls 2 week gap between camp and school…..
part of being a parent is caring for your child. maybe find a job that allows you to prioritise your family
As far as I know there are very few jobs that allow you to not work at this time. they are teachers and playgroup morahs. most are not in a position to take off
In that case the onus is on business owners to accommodate the parents, and not the other way around.
Why is it that in today’s day and age if the kids have off the parents freak out? The children oit first and foremost a parents responsibility. I agree the girls and boys schedules in Lakewood should coincide so the parents only take off once not many different times. To say the kids should only have off 2 days is ot right. Firstly believe ot or not the kids need off and let them be bored and looking forward to daycamp. The kids today don’t know how to entertain themselves exactly because of this reason they never have a chance to have more than 2 days off. No one was concerned that they ended yeshiva camp and were home by 4pm the latest and had the rest of the evening some older boys till 9-10pm doing nothing. That was more harmful to any kid than if they would’ve had regular daycamp like the girls have. The learning might not be as intense but they wouldn’t be roaming the streets from 4pm.
Parents have to realize they got married and had children figure oit how to deal with days off.
Agree the issue is really differing schedules for boys, girls, elementary and high school. it makes it hard to spend quality family time together.
You’re so cute.
The girls have 3 weeks off between school and camp, something the boys don’t have. And parents screaming and writing furious letters every year doesn’t do anything.
The schools simply don’t care enough to change anything. They run around the camp schedules which runs around the yeshiva schedule, with them prioritizing the parnassah of sleepaway camp owners over tens of thousands of children. This has to be the saddest reality of all time.
Chinuch of the children should come first. Giving these kinds of breaks (such as the 1 week for the boys and 3 weeks for the girls), knowing there is ZERO structure offered anywhere, and that MOST parents work these days is something they just simply ignore.
Most Boys schools ended Wed/ Thurs
Camps started today, wednesday.
so like the camps kinda needed time to trnsition
and ditto for the schools .
So like what would you like to happen?
The system can’t be perfect for every scenario?
The system must coordinate the schedules, it’s impossible to work like this. Let alone the camps starting at 9:45. I mean how are we expected to pay the high prices of camp and also tuition since it keeps being raised like crazy, if we don’t work? To pay all these high prices we have to keep working harder to bring in a higher salary.
When did schools become a babysitting service?
What do you and your wife do for a living???
The answer is rabbeim.
Most rabbeim do not make enough money to cover their expenses from their job during the year and therefore the take jobs working in camps in the summer. The people running your childs camp are probably also Rebbeim during the year.
That one week break gives Rabbeim a little bit of breathing room to rejuvinate and reenergize in order to be the best possible Rebbi for your son.
What is the letter writer’s post going to contain when camp concludes & school begins?
The comments here that are pro the off time are the teachers and rebbeim who want the vacation. The letter writer and the comments pro this letter are hard working people who also want a vacation but cannot take off so many days because offices do not allow it. We work hard to cover the expense of these teachers and rebbeims salaries. You can’t have it both ways. You can’t raise teacher salaries and tuition and then get sensitive when the hard working people are asking to be able to go to work to earn the money to pay your salaries. This year the boys have one week off between camp and school and the when yeshiva starts the girls have one week off between camp and school. Most offices do not allow 2 weeks off. So the question remains how should we work to pay teacher salaries if we have kids home for 2 weeks? The answer is the camps should offer the option of an additional week with the older kids being counselors for the younger kids!
Keep in mind that many camps rent out school buildings & until the camps clean up their supplies & the school can get cleaned (& repainted if necessary) & set up for the next year, there needs to be time to take care of that. While offering an extra week or whatever (while many counselors start mesivta elul zman & can’t come late to the zman), Where exactly do you want this to happen? The schools need time to clean & set up… It’s not that simple…
Well, why don’t we do the opposite, let all office owners know that we simply aren’t available that week? If all parents would stand up for their children’s needs, business owners would learn to work around family schedules.
When a cheder should give off is a halacha question discussed at length in shulchan aruch. This should be decided by morei horaah not by school administrators or yentas…
I actually like having my boys home. I find it an amazing way for them to rejuvenate and connect.
what do you and your spouse do for a living????
This makes me laugh. What would you be saying if your kids had the whole summer off? They are kids. Let them be kids.
What do you and your spouse do for a living???
You have a problem with your children being home for 2-3 weeks. Want to switch religions? My children were home from the middle of June to the beginning of September.
Yawn. Same letters every year. Same issue. Same complaints. Nothing changes.
As two full time working parents, we switch off who takes off which days and for how long. Or we get a babysitter, depending on the age of the kid(s) that is home. Yes, its more money, it’s frustrating, and it’s certainly not ideal, but we make it work.
I’m all for solutions to this problem (especially the girls getting home from school at 11:30 on Friday! By the time I get to work, I have to leave to catch her bus).
Until you have a solid plan with a solution that the schools and camps are willing to carry out effectively, all I can say is, these are the challenges of the working middle class, its just life. Yes, its frustrating, but these are your challenges. If you wouldn’t have these challenges, you would have other ones. Complaining and getting upset does nothing to rectify the situation, and it only affects yourself, your mood, and your attitude, which in turn affects your children. They learn from you how to deal with situations that are less than ideal. Don’t send them the message that Mommy and Daddy don’t want them at home by complaining about the schedule. Fix your attitude and choose to live a happy life.
Lakewood is a great place to learn, but not so great to raise a family. The town has yet to face reality and adjust accordingly, we are still a small yeshiva town that just so happens to be the largest outside Israel. We are also all sitting and learning when in reality 90% are regular working fathers and mothers.
Are you saying the town of Lakewood should take care of the kids during the time between school and camp?
Not sure why all the negative comments to this post. Writer is not saying his family doesn’t come first or that he doesn’t want to have his kids at home; it’s a practical and logistical issue.
People need to work to get paid, and the only way for that to happen is to be at work. Most employees do not have the luxury or work flexibility to tell their boss, “see ya in 3 weeks because my kids are home”.
In addition, the schools raise tuition every year (and this does not typically coincide with a likewise raise) and they expect the parents to pay that increase, yet they are also by default asking those same parents to stay home or pay additional costs to close the (big) gap between camp and school.
If you don’t like Lakewood move out. BTW, Lakewood isn’t a place where everyone sits and learns. It hasn’t been that in a very long time. Every place else in the world people raise their children and don’t blame the schools that their children are a burden. If you find it too difficult to be a parent don’t get married and have children. The only legitimate issue is one that’s the same everywhere, that’s why can’t all the schools give vacation the same time so everyone can find a solution.
What do you and your spouse do for a living??
Work, out of the house. It’s a struggle when the kids have off. But it’s part of your responsibility as the parents to find a way to make it work. If you want the schools to be open 365, pay for it. how does the low end of 12k per child per year sound? Will that make it any easier? I doubt anyone wants that either. You got married, had children, now it’s time to be parents.
Let’s resolve the shidduch crisis. Anyone that doesn’t want to be a parent should state that and leave the shidduch market.
Every year, I look forward to some variation of this letter being posted
Just curious if anyone knows when the girl schools are going to start this year? Camp ends august 17th please some say that they are starting Sept 5-6. That would be really harder to deal with.
I just heard from my school that it starts September 6.
I think that there is a very important point that is being missed.
Lakewood works for the learning and the very wealthy. The struggling middle class not so much.
What I mean is: I wish to spend my kids off time with them. Connecting with them ect.
If I take off for a week in the beginning of the summer and the end of the summer. Let’s not get in to how many off days there are the whole year long. I won’t have a job!!
No boss wants to close their business according to school schedule.
Due to the fact that unless your very have a very high paying job. You need two incomes.
I think Lakewood is a beautiful community. I just think that it’s not catered to the middle class.
Whether it’s housing, groceries or schools schedules.
Keep in mind best job in Lakewood is a babysitter. Extremely high income and flexibility to take off when needed.
I don’t get it. You decided to have kids. Why should the town be responsible for your kids. What do all the millions of people in this country do whose children are off all summer. Most of them are not rich either. Oh, you poor people that have their kids home for a week or two. I feel so sorry for you.
I’ve Got the solution!
that’s what bubbies are for!
and if someone doesn’t have a bubby, we’ll do a ADOPT-A-BUBBY Program!
Brillaint
My boys last day was on Thursday last week. They ended at 12.30pm
Daycamp started this week on Monday at 10 am.
Am I missing something?
Just curious… what do people do in other places? Brooklyn, yerushalayim, monsey, Cleveland? Is it better there? Is this a specific Lakewood issue?
people are commenting that since you had kids, you should parent them.
I dont think the majority of frustrated parents commenting here are opposed to that. But clearly they cant, because they have to work. Telling them to take off is silly because if they did not work they would lose their job, or at the very least lose the money they need to support the very schools that make decisions based on what’s good for the rebbeim/morahs rather than the parent body.
This has been ongoing for years, my oldest son is thirty and I have been grappling with this for so long.
I think maybe it’s extra difficult in Lakewood, because we stress so much on working mothers so that the fathers can learn. Perhaps in other towns there are a higher percentage of stay at home mothers, and it’s not a hardship for them like it is for us.
Therefore, since it’s an outgrowth of the “town’s” hashkafa, yes, the “town” should change some things so that working mothers are more supported and not feeling attacked.
That being said, I hate to sound like a heretic, but maybe a lot of our problems could be alleviated if there was more on an emphasis on mothers being home with their kids and not being spread so thin that they are always feeling they have to be perfect mothers, perfect wives, perfectly put together and also big earners. How much can one person handle? something has to give! And I hope it’s not our kids…
A school’s job is to educate your child. Schools are not a babysitting service. As a teacher in Lakewood for the he past 15 years, who puts heart and soul into my teaching I resent the fact that it seems that all the parents really value me for is that I take their child off their hands. I get that there’s a hardship for many families so…. Why don’t the grocery stores take responsibility for the kids between school and camp? Or the rabbis? Maybe all the people in town who don’t work should offer to watch your kids??? why is it my responsibility to help you watch your kids any more than someone else’s? And please don’t start with the teachers are so lucky they have off in the summer… it’s a free country. You can apply for a teaching job.