When you’re depressed, everything you used to enjoy is now a drag and pointless. Depression sucks everything out of life. However, there’s often another aspect of depression that keeps people stuck in it.

Depression deceives you. Many clients have told me that even when they do enjoy something, it feels fake. Why? The depression convinced them that the misery they feel is actually the true reality. Life is dark, empty and meaningless. Nothing matters and any happiness, pleasure or engagement in life is a facade. Enjoying anything is not real, it’s a temporary distraction from real life, the miserable life.

That belief is the real problem. If real life is misery, and vitality is just a distraction, why bother getting better? It’s just an escape that will soon evaporate, leaving you even more miserable. It sucks out all the motivation for recovery.

While it feels logical, that belief is sourced in the chemistry of the depression. When you feel depressed, you think depressed. When you are OK, that belief seems utterly ridiculous.

More than the actual feeling of depression, that belief is what keeps people stuck. It’s impossible to get better if you hold on to the belief that feeling better is a scam. A prerequisite to resolving the depression is letting go of that belief. It’s possible to let go of that belief even while feeling depressed. You don’t need to believe that how you feel is the true reality. That is a choice. To let that belief go, there’s a choice you have to make. Which life is real? The one in which everything is dark and empty or the life of vitality you knew before the depression, when the sun shining was real.

Don’t believe the insidious voice of depression. You don’t need to feel better to decide your policy on life.

When you decide that life is meaningful, even if you don’t feel that way in the moment, your vitality has already begun its comeback. That “policy” frees you to reengage in the things in life that give you the vitality you need, and the clarity and confidence that it’s worth it!

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Chaim Moshe Steinmetz LISW is a psychotherapist in private practice and provides in person and telehealth therapy internationally for a variety of issues. Aside from the traditional weekly session model, Chaim Moshe also offers the “Master Session”. A “Master Session” is a unique, targeted, single session that is transformative for many issues. For more info, and to subscribe to “From Stress to Serenity” emails, visit https://www.chaimmoshesteinmetz.com/